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If ever there was a “F*ck yeah!” moment superior to the one he experienced today, Tim Lincecum would be hard-pressed to find it.

The San Francisco Giants have reached a record-breaking agreement with their star pitcher, thus avoiding arbitration with the two-time Cy Young Award winner.

You might want to sit down for this.

According to Hank Schulman of The San Francisco Chronicle, the deal is worth two years and $40.5 million dollars—making it the largest contract ever for an arbitration-eligible player with less than six years experience. It also buys out his arbitration eligibility after next season.

Lincecum’s massive contract translates to roughly $82,992 dollars per strikeout (based on his annual average of 244 Ks per season since 2008). Yup, every time Timmy strikes someone out, he makes more money than the average, full-time registered nurse does in a year.

Here are just a few of the mind-blowing adjectives that came to mind when I first learned of the deal: buttload, massive, colossal, elephantine, gargantuan, ginormous, walloping, shload… Feel free to add your own in the comments section below.

The previous record for a player with less than six years of major league experience was broken last Tuesday when the Philadelphia Phillies’ Cole Hamels agreed to a one-year, $15 million dollar contract to avoid arbitration.

Timmy will get $18 million dollars in 2012, $22 million dollars in 2013, plus a $500,000 signing bonus.

Lincecum, 27, owns a 69-41 record, 2.98 ERA, 1.188 WHIP, 9.9 SO/9 rate, and 3.3 BB/9 rate in five seasons with the Giants. He has also been named to the last four All-Star teams and has never been on the disabled list. (Knock on wood.)

The Giants had hoped to sign Timmy to an even longer-term contract. (It was reported earlier this week that Lincecum had turned down a 5-year, $100 million dollar offer.)

With the signing, the Giants’ 2012 payroll is now at $128.283 million dollars.

I guess I better get started on that adjectives list for next year.

By Troy Nelson via FeedCrossing
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